The Danger Game: Comparison. [3 Steps To Benefit From It]

"But, I will never dance as beautifully as that girl." A student once said to me.

Enter the danger game: Comparison.

Most advice given to people is only a half-truth. 

"Don't compare yourself to someone else." is most people's rusty advice.

Whilst it is true you do not want to compare yourself if it's an unrealistic measurement.

For example: Being a 75-year-old dancer and comparing against a 17-year-old dancer.

But by in large the undiscussed truth is absolutely compare yourself IF you use it as a non-competitive gauge to step up your game.

Listen. 

You are unique, you are special and you are different.

Don't make the mistake thinking by not comparing yourself the right way you are doing yourself any favours because you are not.

If you are honest with yourself you do it anyway because you have been trained from birth to compare yourself to everyone else.

So you may as well know how to benefit from it.

How to play the comparison game the right way:

1. Perspective

Your power of perception is what controls your attitude.

If you use your perception to cast your focus on someone else's achievements and compare against your own results in a negative light you're going to feel terrible. 

However, if you use your perception as a mechanism for searching for the how, why, what motivates that person and use your power of observation to then upskill on your own attitudes, behaviours, and habits you will feel motivated and want to do better.

2. Grace

Give yourself a break.

You are doing the best you can with what you have and when you're ready for the next level it will reveal itself.

Know that the other person does something better than you but you also do something better than every person you meet. 

Time cannot be forced and you cannot rush the growth you must go through to reach your outcomes.

3. Discernment

The truth is rarely in the appearance of things.

Quit looking at the glossy external appearance. You have no idea what that person went through, what they may be going through or the level of dedication behind closed doors you never saw.

In my experience, interviewing and studying the lives of thousands of people, without exception - the price was so, so, so high and the time committed for any great achievement that they are so far ahead it looks easy for them.

Then you have a look at what someone has dedicated themselves to day and night for many, many years and turn it against yourself.

The real question is: Are you willing to pay the same high price or higher?

Practice discernment and realize that you have the same power flowing to and through you and if you're willing to sacrifice and play the long-term game you can create your own position by following your own unique path.

Just like the student who asked me this question, I give you the same insight.

Only compare if you find the lessons in their behaviour and it inspires you to be a better version of yourself.

Vaughan.